South African Women are Dead

South African women are dead.

Dear sis Pinky

I saw your video and I was moved, unfortunately for you I am part of a very small minority. Mama, our women are dead. You were speaking to corpses. As you have noted, there was no public outcry or social media rage about Nanziwe Rulashe. We as a nation watched a woman being dragged ON THE FLOOR, by a group of civilized men in an urban area where they have access to education. We have see this ugly side of ANC before with some of its senior officials beating women, but nothing so brazen. In the middle of an office, with people in the office, grown men and women stood and did nothing while a woman was being physically dragged out. Everybody went about their business. We also saw how the woman in white who led the onslaught on another woman has been the easy scapegoat. Nobody even knows the names of the men who dragged a woman on the floor, exposing her undergarments for the world to see. And how do we even sleep at night after hearing her scream, ‘Kutheni undihlukumeza? ‘

South African women are broken. Our men have broken us. We don’t even cry when they hit us anymore. We are now used to it. Violence on women in South Africa is so normal and accepted you will find it in various sectors of society comfortably existing within the community like a favorite uncle. The violence is in our homes, our offices, at the post office and even in our friendships where we sell each other at the club for drinks. Violence against women has been normalized. Degrading women is a sport in South Africa, it is met with open cheer and applause. Men in South Africa no longer know how to exist without shaming women, and women have learnt to tolerate it.

Women in South Africa are oppressed and not allowed to stand out. Those who stand out, are cut down.

Sis Pinky, your message didn’t land because you are speaking to zombies, they do not know any better. At the moment we have a woman with presidential ambitions, you would think it would be us women rallying behind her to create a historical moment for ourselves. We have never had a female president. But you will find our sisters, rallying with men behind the narrative of Lindiwe Sisulu being an entitled surname. Is that a good enough reason when Khwezi and Marikana were overlooked? The male presidents came in with baggage that society ignored, this woman’s sin is that she has a politically connected surname? Can we please take ourselves seriously for once? We are watching Lindiwe Sisulu being torn apart by misogynistic men who don’t want unruly women. The recent release of an apology that was written on her behalf by a man, speaks to the level of disrespect in this country. She is a woman, she must be spoken for.

South Africans are not ready to evolve, the man is the head and he can do whatever he wants. In this case, owing to social economic conditions in this country, the head is toxic and bitter. The head is bitter because he can’t find a job and women are being empowered, so at home he wants to remind the woman her place. The ‘head’ abandoned his family so essentially he is full of shame, defensiveness and arrogance. The head has been taught that yena uyindoda so when he meets a strong woman, he only knows to break her down. And to break her down he has.

Sis Pinky your message was powerful, I just wish you were not speaking to a bunch of corpses. The system has killed them. The GBV pandemic in this country has been ignored for so long, it has found legal ways to exist within us. We have come to a place where if women report gbv, their cases get thrown out and when they speak out, they get gag orders. The law works for perpetrators, not for victims. The first question you are asked is ‘how dare you defame this man and accuse him of rape/assault? ‘…… the perpetrators are never asked ‘Why are you being accused of this? ‘ The law will not even consider a man’s problematic past, it will be more concerned with protecting his reputation. The law does not believe women.

Women know the law does not believe them and they are now toxic. They lie. No more f***s are given. ‘They are gonna rape us anyway so who cares’ is the attitude.

We are now in a vicious circle where we don’t know who is lying about being raped and who is lying about not raping. There is no system which deals directly with rape and GBV. This is odd considering we are living in the rape capital of the world.

A woman was dragged in broad daylight in government offices in South Africa, that is the level of Femicide we have reached. Our female leaders are being dragged and there are Many women in white helping the men.